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Posts published in “Uncategorized”

Solid brass balls

This pilot has nothing short of solid brass balls…  the size belonging to an elephant!

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Draw your own conclusion

This photo showed up in my email today.  I know nothing about it – except this guy DID have a coyote problem.

coyote

Happy Turkey Day!!

Typical expenditure of a Turkey Day around the patch of Grey Fuzz… The girls are working away in the kitchen preparing a tryptophan laced feast of all the usuals.  The football game is on the TV, where I somewhat patiently await the gorging that will ensue in very short order.  The overly blatant  *sneak attacks* on anything not having a well trained guard in place will continue until meal time, just a part of the holiday’s games.  Something sure smells good, think I’ll see if I can find out!

Happy Turkey Day from the Grey Fuzz!

Poor Kitty :)

A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students.
‘Human Beings are the only animals that stutter,’ she says.

A little girl raises her hand. ‘I had a kitty-cat who stuttered.’

The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become,
Asked the girl to describe the incident.
‘Well’, she began, ‘I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler
that
lives next door Got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over
the fence into our
yard!’

‘That must’ve been scary,’ said the teacher.
‘It sure was,’ said the little girl. My kitty raised his back, went Sssss,
Sssss, Sssss’
And before he could say ‘Shit,’ the Rottweiler ate him!

The teacher wet her pants laughing.

Petition for Obama’s Birth Cert.

Something interesting I found today…  Click here to view and sign the petition.  I’m not saying that the one provided earlier is not accurate, however there is plenty of room for doubt…. large portions of the timelines presented just don’t quite line up with interviews.

Hell

The following is “Claims to be” an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term.  Pretty funny either way.

The answer by one student was so ‘profound’ that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student , however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by

Teresa during my Freshman year that, ‘It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,’ and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct……leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting ‘Oh my God.’

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.

Dad at the Mall

A funny passed on via email………

I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some
new shoes (he is 92). We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I
noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had
spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue. My
dad kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find him staring
every time.

When the teenager had had enough, he sarcastically asked, ‘What’s the
matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?’

Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on
his response, knowing he would have a good one, and in classic style he
did not bat an eye in his response. ‘Got drunk once, and had sex with a
peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son.’

It’s a darn good thing I didn’t have anything in my mouth!

Paperwork

Did you read the paper today?  Don’t let these guys help!